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Sunday, October 9, 2011

Just a Quickie with a Cop--In which you must forgive any typos because the spell check thing isn't working

The other day I had an encounter with a She Cop.

She was scary.

Scary She Cop
Well... SHE wasn't scary, per se, but what she DID was scary, per se. I like to say "per se."

Allow me to elaborate.

I was driving (in a car) on my way to drop off some movies that I had rented and were late. Anywhosits, as I was driving (in a car) I was messing with the radio. Because I was messing with the radio I didn't notice the light in front of me turn yellow.

Oh No!

As it was, I probably wouldn't have stopped anyway, because I was too close to the intersection to stop, but I passed through a yellow light.

And that's when I saw a cop car coming from the other direction.
The She Cop was inside. (I coul see her...)

Suddenly she pulled into the turning lane, and, just after I passed her, she made a U-turn (possibly illegally) and got into traffic RIGHT BEHIND ME!

I shit you not.

So, to recap, I ran a yellow light, she cop made an illegal U-turn to pull into traffic right behind me, and I am not shitting you.

I was nervous.

But she didn't turn on her lights.

So I kept going.

She stayed right behind me.

But she didn't turn on her lights.

So I kept going.

Finally I turned left, and she went straight, and, alas, we never saw each other again.

But she scared me.

My theory is that since I could see her, she could probably see me too. When she was driving towards me she must have spotted me, and been awe-struck by my excessive cuteness.

That's right. She wanted a piece of this.

Obviously what happened was this: the She Cop had never seen anything so beautiful as me in her whole life, and she turned and followed me PURELY for the joy of gazing at me with utter adulation for a few brief moments more.

It was probably the highlight of her life... and the closest I'll get to a girlfriend.

I will cherish it like nobody's business.

So that, my friends, was my quickie with a cop... a She Cop.

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