Welcome bar

"Teach me to run with scissors..."

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Thanksgiving and birthdays on the 24 of November, 1982

Yeah, the title pretty much says it all.

So, I posted on my facebook asking for blog ideas from my readers. :D

Only one responded. :(

It was Satchel, nonetheless.

Satchel Posting
What she posted was  "thanksgiving and birthdays on the 24 of nov. 1982" [sic].

After a day or two NO ONE ELSE wanted me to blog about anything. :( Obviously my other fans hate me. However, I'm willing to do this blog dedicated to the ideas of Satchel, because I'm lobbying her to name her next child Pavel... even if it's a girl. :D

So, first, we will delve into Thanksgiving.
It's a day for giving thanks.

Nuff said?

Now for birthdays on November 24, 1982... >:)

A little bit of math (2011-1982=29) shows us that any person or persons with this birthday is about to become AO. Which, as everyone knows, is "Almost Old."

You see... ages work like this:
0-1 Baby
2-4 Toddler

5-12 Kid
13-19 Teenager (aka mentally imbalanced individual)
20 Limbo
21-25 Young Adult
26-29 Adult
30-45 Old
46-65 "Middle aged"
66-79 Young at Heart
80-89 Old (again)
90-99 Very Old
100+ Ancient Relic of the Dinosaurs...

Anyone born on November 24th of 1982 is approaching their last year of "Adult," and is almost Old! Shortly (very shortly) we'll have to drum said person out of the ranks of the youthful. :\ Unless he or she is a celebrity. Somehow they can stay young for decades...

Go figure.

Now, if we do some assuming, we should assume that Satchel wanted us to blog about birthdays on November 24th of 1982 because HER birthday is on November 24th of 1982.

I can see the tabloids now:


Obviously we have to prevent this from happening.

We have a few options:
1) Make Satchel into a celebrity (this can buy her a few more years).
2) Kill her before her birthday (sadly, not a legal option).
3) Get her to sign a contract legally naming her child (be it male or female) Pavel.
4) All of the above.

Personally, I'm a fan of #1... sadly, the most celebratory thing she's done is give me minions. :\ Not many people gonna buy her CD for that.

Her brothers, dad, and husband are big and scary, so killing her is basically off the table.

Number 4 is just stupid.

That leaves us only one option.

Satchel, if you're reading this, NAME YOUR CHILD PAVEL!
Or Melville... I like Melville too...

Anywho... peace out, ciao and go do some evil. -_-

No comments:

Post a Comment